Wednesday, April 18, 2007

*WARNING, DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED!!!*

Please do not read this if you are shy about feminine issues. I have a very embarrassing situation. Nipples. For some odd reason mine are particularly perky. Now this is not a new phenomenon since, BW, I wore T-shirts and patterned shirts that really didn't show them so much. Now that I'm working, and wearing dressier clothes, the shirts are thinner & usually a solid color. I feel like I've got a couple of freaking spelunking lamps on my chest! And, I don't know if anyone else has this problem, but, if I'm not careful while dressing they can wind up pointing in odd directions. Sort of like a lazy eye, but different, so very different. The other great part is sometimes I need to adjust myself. Normally I wouldn't notice, hence, wouldn't care.

THE ELEVATORS AT MY OFFICE ARE MIRRORED!!!!

How hideous is that?!? Not only do I have to be confronted with the fact that my bangs are looking like David Cassidy and my lipstick needs to be reapplied (what's up with that anyway?) I can see in living (gold tinted anyway) color that I need to readjust. It's even better when I'm standing right on the side so that 1/2 of me is reflected in the door & 1/2 in the wall. Makes my right breast look like it is growing out of my neck and the left is growing out of my stomach. I, invariably, decide THAT is the time to adjust...so I do...I'm alone...what's the big?

SECURITY CAMERAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I remember the security cameras I try to be embarrassed...until the next time.

Maybe I should start waving.
Or just flash them.

1 comment:

lady31 said...

I am so rolling off my chair and peeing my pants laughing. Vanessa says she can gage the weather by my radar dots. LOL!!!!!!!!!!! But I get it. If the dots are up I at least want them pointed in the right direction, and not cross-eyed.