Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Raising Future Delinquents

Since #1 has been telling people about his future in the seminary, I've had a number of reactions. Most have been overwhelmingly positive. As a rule, I don't usually get negative reactions from people about much of anything, I don't know why it is, but it is. The worst have been raised eyebrows and a "That's nice?" I just beam and say, why yes it is! The reaction that has surprised me the most has been, "You must be a great mother!!!" While I try my best to be a good mom, I have so very many shortcomings that glare at me all the time. I guide my kids as best I can, but his vocation is totally a God thing. Just to show that I'm not going to be canonized any time soon, I offer this little glimpse into our lives.
One night this week, homework was finished and a minion asked if I knew how to pick locks. I wiggled my eyebrows mysteriously and said "Maybe." This set off a whirlwind of shouting & begging. "I knew you knew how!" "Teach me, Mom." and "Pleasepleasepleaseplease showmehowtodoit!" I tried to redirect, we needed to get ready for bed. No dice, the Minions were in full frenzy. #2 looked me in the eye and said "Mom, what if it was the zombie apocalypse, we were all locked in a room and you were passed out? Would you want to die because you never taught us to pick locks?!" How could I argue with that logic? I looked at the doors in the house, only the bathroom door has the hole allowing it to be picked. I thought, this isn't so bad, how much havoc could they wreak? Note to self: Never ask that question in this house. I locked the bathroom door, straightened a bobby pin and proceeded to unlock it. The Minions were wild with glee. I guided each one in turn in the magical process. They all did it, with varying levels of ease. It then was decided that the bathroom must always remain locked. If one wants to use the facilities, one must earn one's entrance. When I mentioned that might not be a good idea, what if, for instance, someone had a bathroom emergency? #1 replied "That is a good opportunity to learn how to function under pressure. If someone needs to use the bathroom, they will have to calm themselves and unlock it."
What followed was a day & a half of cursing at the bathroom door and lots of giggling. I've put an end to that new rule.

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